A friend recently announced on Facebook that they had quit their job so they could work full-time as a writer. They had always dreamed of becoming one and they’re going to give it their best shot. I hope they succeed because A) They are a great writer and person and B) As a fellow dream chaser or at the very least, a-striving-for-better-lifer, it would be very encouraging.
Anyways, this person later posted a link to a great article called “25 Things every writer needs to stop doing” and top of the list was worrying. It’s a useless habit, the author says, and kind of like that old episode of MAD TV with Bob Newhart, admonishes the anxious writer and says “Stop it!”
Easier said than done, but in all honesty, he’s absolutely right. It is a bad habit that achieves nothing positive and is certainly not restricted to aspiring or established professional writers. After coming back to work and muddling through the blues and crankiness, I’ve also been worrying about my future: What if I don’t get into the Graphic Design program? What if I hate it? It’s tough, what if I can’t hack it? What if I can’t find decent summer temp jobs? What if we run out of money? What if I take the program, graduate and still hate my job? Or worse: What if I can’t find a job? Graphic Design is a pretty saturated market, lots of creativity and talent out there.
And then comes the wave of regrets and ‘What was I thinking not pursuing this sooner?’ broken record..
There’s also a portfolio workshop at the college coming up next month. You bring your book(s) and those in charge of the more creative programs (Graphic Design, Animation, Interior Design) give you some input. While I am proud of my eagerness, I am scared to death of that day. I spent hours working on my portfolio, what if they don’t like it? I very well may go completely batshit.
But all this worrying is giving me a migraine and cutting in on my precious sleeping, so y’know what? Fuck it. I am working my ass off to get in, all I can do is hope they appreciate the effort and give me a chance. I have researched this career, audited classes and it sounds right, nay it feels right, but if God forbid, I do end up not liking it in the end, then I’ll deal with it or keep fighting to find my fit. (Or at least best compromise)
Because that’s all any of us can do; Work hard, hope for the best and fight for the gratification to be proud of ourselves and our achievements.
Charlie Brown (model of anxiety and overanalysis): http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/and-all-jazz/201003/the-charlie-brown-theory-personality